January Hmmmm.

It’s January 10th. I’m sat on the train and on my way back to Leicester. I’ve had a nice Christmas and don’t really want to leave – not the place, just the people.

Anyway, my point is that it’s January 10th. January the 10th and I’m only just deciding my New Years resolutions right here, right now on the train. Oops.

I don’t usually make concrete resolutions, I’m pretty easy on myself, but I’ve got to make them and stick to them this year!

Begin, shall I?

Climb girl, climb.

On my return to uni, I am purchasing my insurance card which allows me to join the climbing club, then I can climb regularly and hopefully gain more confidence, strength and technique. I’m afraid of falling, but the more confidence I get on the wall, the less I fear the height and the falling part becomes less likely to happen.

#HealthyGoals

This resolution just involves sticking to my healthy eating habits no matter where I am – maybe it will help others around me eat a little better too?

Less sugary temptations, more fruits and nuts!

Balancing the pounds

The pounds I refer to here are of the financial kind. I need to try my best to only buy necessities and just treat myself once in a while.

Easier said than done, but one of those money box challenges may help me save.

ZzzzzZzzzzzZzz

I must go to bed earlier, Netflix less and avoid napping during the day. Or just go to bed earlier.

Stress less

About everything. Maybe organising myself as much as possible will help, the more sleep certainly will too.

I shall focus on less things at once, tackling things one at a time, whatever they are, will certainly make life easier. It may also help me focus more.

That’s all of my New Years resolutions, or at least what I can think of right now!

I’m looking forward to climbing more and becoming stronger because of it.

I look forward to seeing the ones I love again soon, sucks being away from your favourite people.

Until next time,

XOXO

Hannah.

Advertisements

That’s That

This week (this Thursday to be exact) is finally my last day at college! After doing two years of sixth form and a year at college doing the complete wrong course for me, I found the one that was right and now I am about to finish that too.

A couple of days ago I got my final grade for the course I had been studying — Print-Based Media/Creative Media Production/Journalism — it has so many names that I have lost count, but the point is that I was very pleased with the grade I received.

I have proven to myself that I really can succeed if the challenge is within something that I am passionate about. As a person that always dreads the day I get educational results, I was positively shocked and I could feel the majority of my stress dissolving into the atmosphere around me.

Although I still have to wait until one result, this has certainly been a weight off and this grade has shown me that I did do the right thing in deciding to procrastinate in college for a further two years. I have used this time to figure my shit stuff out and then realise that University actually was a possibility for me.

Hitting slow-mo on going to University truly was a great decision for me because I have used the time that I would have been at University to get the ‘I’ve just turned 18, let’s go clubbing ALL THE  TIME’ behaviour out of the way and I will be going into this with a little more maturity and understanding of myself. Yes, I will still go out and drink, but it’ll be much more responsibly as I prefer a chilled evening with friends at the pub than clubbing until stupid o’clock anyway.

Stress will always exist because there is no way of me avoiding absolutely everything that stresses me out, but I am going to handle it in the best way possible and just stay positive about everything as much as I can.

For anyone out there that has absolutely no idea what they want to do with their life or their career; I can assure you that I have been there and everybody has their own timeline. Don’t jump into anything if you’re not ready and do things on your own terms, find yourself and everything else will fall into place.

You, reader, just peeked into my brain.

see you next time!

XOXO

Hannah.

All too much

The last couple of weeks have been a struggle and I have found it hard to post anything on my blog. I have written countless drafts, those of which I felt were too honest or risky to share with the internet (or any of my readers that are close to home).

I have been stressing about everything from money problems to what the future holds for my education. I have put many feelings on hold to focus on other things and it’s messing with my mind. Half of my time I spend worrying about money, the other half I spend wishing I wasn’t so lonely.

Nobody talks about the emotions that come with the in-between months before university, not being able to hold anything too close to your heart because you know that it has to end prior to moving away. I have my friends, but that isn’t always enough. I feel I am restricted. I don’t want to be alone for seven months, but I don’t want a new relationship with someone. I am in a place where I am mentally and physically unprepared for anything new. I want what used to be, but an improved version — that’s what it would be — if I were to go back. Going back isn’t even a way to look at this, it would be the turning point.

Nothing could ever be as it was, I have used this alone time to become a better person. I learned a lot about myself and the way I used to be. The improved me would make for an incredible relationship. One that would be amazing but would never work in these seven months, not if it had to end. There is still a lot of growing to do, a lot of personal goals to achieve. It would be selfish to even consider anything right now.

I am all for achieving these goals, I am just not coping with the isolation that comes with it.

Just a snippet of my current tangled thoughts and emotions,

XOXO

Hannah.

Things I learned from Fangirl

After reading Fangirl (written by Rainbow Rowell) I feel I learnt a few things about life and also that it’s a great book that everyone should read, young or old.

FANGIRL

Family is family no matter what;

No matter what shit you go through with your family, when it comes down to the important stuff you or them will always come to the rescue. That’s the thing about family, the love is always there wether we choose to show it or not.

When Cath and Wren go through rough patches and months of not talking, they are always brought back together by something important.

These important things keep them from parting to the point of no return and show that no matter what has happened, they are sisters and thats a strong enough bond to survive anything.

Growing up is optional;

Yes, to a certain extent we all have to grow up and mature, but that doesn’t mean letting go of things that we have loved through our childhood.

Cath writes Fanfiction about the Simon Snow book/film series and continues it to a certain extent throughout her college life, she goes through a lot of writers block and self-doubt about her fiction writing course, but her Fanfiction helps her through in the end.

Finishing her Simon Snow story before the Author published her book was keeping her from focusing on her work, she needed to complete her Fanfic before she could focus her mind on other work.

This doesn’t mean that fanfic is over for her, I think she will always do it, but not to the extent that she did with her Carry On Simon.

It’s ok to be a little weird;

Being normal is boring and if I were normal I would probably have already completely lost my mind.

It’s ok to have little quirks, they are what make you, you.

Everyone has things that they go crazy for that they can’t explain, everyone has their obsessions and without them we would all just be empty shells, with no personality, no differences and we would all be the same.

The things we desire in people are their differences, so it’s more than ok to be different, it’s necessary.

There was one thing about Cath’s character that made me feel a little less crazy and that was her battles with anxiety. I saw a lot of myself in some of the moments where she had social anxiety and didn’t go to the dining hall for ages, so she was living on protein bars.


This book is awesome and I recommend it to everyone.

Buy it here.

Love you all,

XOXO

Hannah.

 

CHRISTMAS, CHRISTMAS, CHRISTMAS!

Just a quick post..

Christmas yesterday was lovely; I ate lots of food, opened some lovely presents and enjoyed the fact that I didn’t have to work.

My boyfriend Owen came round and we had a few drinks, opened some more presents and played Singstar with everyone.

Image

Chilled out with my sister today and we actually didn’t get on each other’s nerves as much as we usually do (which makes a change), must have been the Christmas atmosphere!

I then went to Owen’s house, had a couple more drinks, opened some more lovely presents and played Articulate and Charades.

All in all I had a lovely.

Image

Today is Boxing Day Christmas day at my mums, which means a second Christmas dinner (which was lovely), more great presents and family coming round very soon!

I hope everyone had a lovely Christmas and got everything that they wished for!

I shall be reviewing a few gifts that I received later this week.

Christmas Wishes,

Hannah.

~ XOXO