LA Baby!

Hey everyone!

I haven’t posted in ages and I have no excuse. This time last week I had already returned from LA and was probably getting over the last of my jet lag.

I’ve always wanted to go to America, felt a pull towards the country as a whole. I felt I would fit in better there than I do in England and I’m pretty sure that feeling had proven to be right after my visit. I felt more at home away from my home country!

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This was initially an educational trip, we visited places linked to our course of study. I study Creative Media Production/Print Based Media, which covers pretty much all media platforms and I, personally am focusing my career path towards journalism or film studies. The places we visited were perfect for my current course and possible future career, we went to Los Angeles Times and Los Angeles Magazine where we got to see what it’s like to actually work in that environment. They were currently working towards publishing deadlines, which gave us a chance to see a real and working newsroom in all its glory.

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We went to Venice Beach, Olvera Street, Santa Monica and obviously, Hollywood.

Everywhere we went was breathtaking, each location was different and full of character. I loved Venice Beach and I can’t illustrate exactly what it was like there because it changed at every turn! While wondering across the beautiful mix of sand and skateparks, a few others and I discovered a basketball game being reported by William Baldwin. – I tried searching the internet and found nothing, so I have no clue if it was an important game.

Just a pathway away from the basketball game there was a film crew setting up for what appeared to be some sort of dance movie, it was probably for a really popular one but I don’t particularly watch them (they’re all the same to me).

When we went to Olvera Street it felt like we had stepped into a new country within the country, it was full of history and felt very sacred. It is the oldest part of downtown Los Angeles and everything about it felt historical, this place was all about tradition. It amazed me that one part of LA could be so very different to another.

Next we went to Hollywood which consisted of studio visits and all the tourist-esque things expected from a trip like this. We did the Warner Bros. VIP Studio Tour and the Universal Tram Tour.

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I basically lost it when we went to Warner Bros. as it is the home of Pretty Little Liars. We walked around the outdoor sets of PLL; Rosewood High School, Hollis College, Most of Rosewood really. We didn’t go in the actually sound stage BECAUSE THEY WERE FILMING THAT DAY, I am amazed that I kept it together at all and didn’t have some kind of fan-fueled breakdown. Universal Studios was awesome too, with all the Back to the Future cars and Jurassic Park!

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I loved the tours more than the rides because it was great to get a real understanding of everything that goes into creating films, learning studio secrets and camera tricks. Me being me, I purchased just the right amount of merchandise, but I definitely could have got more!! (Someone take me back, I need the rest of the Pretty Little Liars merchandise section!).

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We had one full day exploring actual Hollywood, shopping a little (my money went on Victoria’s Secret and Sephora that day) and then we had dinner at the Hard Rock Café (where I obviously got a t-shirt).

I loved Hollywood, the studios were better for me as it felt more personal and I gained knowledge. Hollywood was good for photographing your favourite star on the walk of fame and they were setting up a red carpet that day which was interesting to see.

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On our last day we went to Santa Monica, it was a lovely place and I spent most of my time shopping and attempting to explore (harder to do when you have to stay in a group). I got some beautiful pictures, but the memories of being there are better. We didn’t have as long as I hoped in Santa Monica, but I managed to go in a fair few shops and pick up a Bloomingdale’s bag!

We then had a nice long plane ride home.

All-in-all it was a lovely trip, I love America, I love everything about it and it felt like home. Maybe one day it will be my home, but that’s another story for another day.

Currently feeling the blues of being back, but I visited my future University yesterday (my second visit) and I am 100% sure that De Montfort is the place for me. I have my place, it’s just a waiting game now. I have so many plans, hopes, dreams for the future and I look forward to sharing more of my journey with all of you.

Thanks for taking the time to read me rambling on and on, I love you guys.

XOXO

Hannah.

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All too much

The last couple of weeks have been a struggle and I have found it hard to post anything on my blog. I have written countless drafts, those of which I felt were too honest or risky to share with the internet (or any of my readers that are close to home).

I have been stressing about everything from money problems to what the future holds for my education. I have put many feelings on hold to focus on other things and it’s messing with my mind. Half of my time I spend worrying about money, the other half I spend wishing I wasn’t so lonely.

Nobody talks about the emotions that come with the in-between months before university, not being able to hold anything too close to your heart because you know that it has to end prior to moving away. I have my friends, but that isn’t always enough. I feel I am restricted. I don’t want to be alone for seven months, but I don’t want a new relationship with someone. I am in a place where I am mentally and physically unprepared for anything new. I want what used to be, but an improved version — that’s what it would be — if I were to go back. Going back isn’t even a way to look at this, it would be the turning point.

Nothing could ever be as it was, I have used this alone time to become a better person. I learned a lot about myself and the way I used to be. The improved me would make for an incredible relationship. One that would be amazing but would never work in these seven months, not if it had to end. There is still a lot of growing to do, a lot of personal goals to achieve. It would be selfish to even consider anything right now.

I am all for achieving these goals, I am just not coping with the isolation that comes with it.

Just a snippet of my current tangled thoughts and emotions,

XOXO

Hannah.