Living For The Likes: My Fear For Our Generation And The Future.

Hello, I know it’s been forever, but my first year at university is finished now and I am in a much better place than I was before.

This post is about the realisation that I had which led me to delete my Facebook account and create a new, more private profile with much less sharing of, well, everything.

Last year I got to thinking about how advanced technology has become and how social media couldn’t be any less social if it tried to be. People spend a sufficient amount of time on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter etc. every day. We see pictures of their daily life and it looks like they’re having fun, but the reality is that people are living their lives for these pictures and these likes instead of really living.

People today focus more on getting the perfect shot of a sunset for Instagram rather than actually sitting and taking in that lovely view of the sunset for themselves. They are more interested in gaining likes on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter etc. than being liked in real life.

Are we all seriously just living for likes? Is that what our generation has come to? 

Sometimes I wish I could remember more of what life was like before social media, back when the only time people took photos was for their photo albums and scrapbooks, to share with their close friends and not every single acquaintance on their Facebook friends list.

Gone are the days when memories were sacred and personal; when people would share their holiday pictures over a cup of tea and talk about all the amazing places they visited in these photos. Now it’s all about likes.

We do not need other people to validate whether our memories are relevant through how many likes they get on Facebook. Pictures are personal, life is sacred, we overshare and over care about what other people think of our lives.

That’s why I don’t use Facebook the way I used to, I’d rather keep my holiday photos, birthdays and other memories sacred and share them with the people whom these memories actually mean something to.

I removing myself completely, but social media does have it’s pro’s; It’s great to catch up with people that are hard to reach, friends and family across the world, but if these people live in close proximity to you, what’s stopping you from actually interacting with them in real life and sharing your photos and memories in person?

Let’s not let the digital world take over our real world.

🙂

XOXO – TFH.

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Ready?

Yesterday marked the next big step in my life, moving to Leicester and becoming a student at De Montfort University.

After stressing about packing for uni and for a house move, I’ve finally got it together and can proudly say that my childhood room is officially empty. It’s such a strange feeling knowing that when I come back at Christmas, it won’t be to the house that I’ve known my whole life so far.

Although it will be daunting, I know that I am ready to do this, it’s time to take responsibility and learn how to be a proper twenty-something; a somewhat mature version of myself with a sprinkle of crazy (because nobody’s perfect and that would be boring anyway).

I’ve packed way too many mugs and an unwearable amount of clothes, but I’d rather be overpacked than to find I have forgotten everything that I need. Besides, I need to feel at home or I may start to get a little sad.

Unpacking will probably take a while as our Freshers Week starts in tomorrow, so I’ll probably be too busy exploring to open all of my boxes right away!

It’s taken a while, but after a few months on my own I’ve realised that I should always trust my instincts as they always seem to turn out right and I will utilise this wisdom at uni. The minute anything doesn’t seem right, I get a bad feeling or vibe, I shall go with my gut feeling and this should be applied to everything.

I will not depend on others too much as I’ve been let down way too much recently. I am learning to appreciate the people that are here for me and not to expect anything from anyone as eventually they let you down anyway and do exactly what you knew they would (this doesn’t apply to family).

On a positive note, I recently starting climbing again, after seven years out of practice and I really enjoyed it. Did somebody say climbing society?

I’m so ready to start fresh and I’m very excited to see what lies ahead for my future. I look forward to the new friendships I will make and the lessons I will learn.

I hope you join me on this journey as I shall hopefully be posting things regularly again!

See you on the flip side,

XOXO

Hannah.

Sanity, Is That You?

As most of you know — from either reading my blog posts or being around me — I have been über stressed about university and the countdown to getting my results.

After having to wait almost a week after everybody else had received their results, I finally got mine.

I actually found out that I had a place at my desired university (De Montfort) before I’d even received my results, which led me to believe that I had done well, which was confirmed two days later.

It felt like so much stress had disappeared at that moment, a weight lifted off of my shoulders and it felt as if I were walking on air.

I am in an extremely rare moment right now where I actually have nothing to worry about. My personal life isn’t great, but it’s not bad, it just has no significance.

This summer has been the marking of many changes, all of the negatives have been in my personal life, but I didn’t get upset about them like I should have because somewhere deep down inside my intuition told me that this was all happening for a reason. I knew that this was all happening to prepare for bigger, better things and as the weeks passed it became clear that those better things were coming to me in the form of educational success.

Right now I am going to enjoy the time that I have left, which is roughly a month. That’s one whole month sans responsibility, aside from the first instalment of rent and any other money related set backs, this is going to be a fairly relaxed month.

It is a shame about my personal life taking so many hits this summer, I feel like everything that meant something to me has just disappeared and it has left me feeling rather empty at times, but life is all about balance and after my educational track record, it’s about time things went right in that department.

I’m not going to dwell on the bad stuff right now, I need to look at everything as a clean slate and focus on the excitement of starting over.

I’m rather sick of feeling negative, so hopefully my personal life picks up a little, but I’m sure everything will work out for the best as long as I keep a positive attitude about everything.

Here’s to starting over,

XOXO

Hannah.

Pack Up Your Troubles

My idea of packing is procrastinating by becoming re-acquainted with all of the belongings that had slowly lost their use, but still meant enough to me to hoard over the years until now.

I am a naturally reflective person anyway, but when it comes to digging up everything in the room that I have grown up in it also makes me rather sad also. I feel like this is the end of an era, I am letting go of the past, but keeping my memories. This is not only a time to de-clutter and minimise the amount of belongings I have, it is also a time to tidy up my emotions; As I let go of things that I have held onto for many years for the wrong reasons, I am also letting go of those memories attached.

Obviously I will keep many things with high sentimental value, but I must also remember that the memories don’t necessarily live within those objects unless I let them, they live in my mind. It’s time to let go of anything that I am holding onto because I think it is a memory and realise that it truly is just an object.

My packing strategy is simple; I am keeping the things of high importance, luckily many things that hold sentimental value to me are conveniently the right size to fit in my diary — which has expanded in size profusely!

I try on all of my clothes and if in that moment I don’t feel comfortable in it, I know it isn’t something I will wear in the future and for that reason it goes straight in the boot sale pile.

As for books, I am not getting rid of any, I have sorted what is going to uni and what isn’t by matching the books to the moods I may feel while I am away or if the book would possibly be educational to me during my course.

I haven’t actually gotten much packing done due to the fact that anything else seems more interesting to me when I have something that needs to be done.

Part of my procrastination may be due to hunger or boredom, but a bigger part of me is doing this because I am saying goodbye to the house I grew up in and I am doing this slowly.

It feels like everything is changing all at once and I’m not quite sure what to focus on precisely. Both parents are moving/have moved, I’m not in the best place socially right now and I’m about to head to uni (which is a whole lot harder when you still don’t know exactly where you are going).

I cannot quite pinpoint exactly what is stressing me out the most, but I know that soon enough everything will be happening all at once and there will be no time to focus on one single thing.

It feels like I’m in some kind of weird limbo where part of me is waiting for things to happen and the other part of me is afraid of everything that’s right around the corner. I don’t know which way is up and that’s why I’m choosing a Netflix coma over any sort of reality — until my own reality hits me in about a month’s time.

This post is probably rather vague and I hope you’re all just as confused as my emotions are right now.

Until next time (hopefully sooner than later),

XOXO

Han.

Don’t worry, be happy

Ever feel like you put so much effort into something and get nothing back? That’s how I feel after this month and I am now in fear that I am doing the same for this upcoming month too.

Those of you that have me on social media sites will know that I’ve been in a bad mood all week and it’s because I am trapped right now.

I had been counting down for the end of the month, put that date on a pedestal as it were the answer to my problems, because initially it was.

The end of the month was supposed to be the end to my financial difficulty and instead it appears I have worked all month for nothing.

While waiting for a miracle to happen I have been trying to take my mind off this issue with my final major project at college.

I had this idea to analyse the way music makes us feel, how we have specific emotions linked to songs that act almost as a soundtrack to a particular memory. Focusing on this idea has kept me in my own little world, that and my Netflix addiction, which is at an all time high!

While I feel angry, betrayed and exhausted from working for nothing, I know I need to focus on all the positives.

Positivity is key and I have a lot to look forward to. I have university, where is a question of the outcome of my upcoming exams — this is more stress, but I will have a university to go to regardless of my results, thanks to a lucky unconditional offer to fall back on.

I finished Paper Towns and will probably be reviewing that soon and discussing my view on how they are adapting this to the screen.

I have managed to watch almost FIVE SEASONS of The Vampire Diaries which I started watching just before I went to LA at the start of March. Although I am busy, I may have replaced sleep with Netflix to get to where I am in the programme. I am doing this for a reason and that reason is to get up to date in order to write about it for the online magazine in which I write for.

I am not sure what I am going to do about my current financial situation because I am quite frankly struggling now and it’s infuriating as I put all my time and energy in for practically nothing.

So that’s where I’m at right now, just thought I’d update you before I post about other various things!

If anyone else is struggling with the same situation as me, I suggest you focus on the positives too and remember that you’re letting them win if they’re getting you down!

Peace out my darlings,

XOXO

Hannah.

Paris Perfection!

Two weeks ago I went to Paris with one of my best friends and it was lovely in so many ways. I don’t know if it was the break from constant social media shenanigans, being away from multiple sources of stress or just being away from my routine but the feeling of escaping everyday surroundings was a relief.

eiffel

There’s something exhilarating about being somewhere unfamiliar, not knowing exactly where you are but still knowing that you are far from lost. This break — although it was only a few days — put a lot of my stress on hold and forced me to enjoy the moment I was in right there, right then. I was not thinking about the next day, because I didn’t want the one I was having, to end.

disney002

Yes, we went to Disneyland and usually that involves rushing to get on every ride (plan, plan, planning), but for some reason it wasn’t rushed at all. Maybe it was because there were only two of us going around the park alone or because we were the least stressed we had been in months, but we were relaxed each and every day. We were actually late to breakfast on one of the days and didn’t make it to the park until around 10am! Yet somehow we got every ride done that we wanted to and some we even rode twice!

medialive001There was an actual purpose to this trip, which was the Media Live! Conference held in the cinema of Disney Village. I actually attended last year’s one too and they are well worth going to if you are a media student. The conference is great for any questions you have and could even bring out a little inspiration from within.

After our Disneyland days came to an end, we reached our last day and this day was spent getting the basic-tourist-Eiffel-Tower-pictures.

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Instead of going up the Eiffel Tower we decided to explore some of the streets around the landmark and have a deliciously French lunch in a rather posh restaurant that was hidden down one of the side roads and away from all of the tourists. We also found a stand outside the American Library in Paris which was giving away free books, so naturally we took as many as we could carry!

freebooks

All in all it was a lovely trip, a little chilly with only two rainy showers! I wish we could go every year and explore all there is to see in France as a whole.

It was nice to get away from the real world and all the stresses that I face. Next up is LA LA Land at the end of the month and I honestly cannot wait!

Sorry it’s been so long, I have been a very busy girl!

Until next time…

XOXO

Hannah.

If at first you don’t succeed…

What I have come to realise from the past few months is that it has become very easy for me to read people and understand when someone is worth your time.

Not everyone has the same goals and priorities, but when it comes down to caring for people and being there it should come as a natural instinct to drop the less important things or at least respond.

I am so over waiting around for people and wasting my precious time on people who wouldn’t do the same for me if the roles were reversed. I do not know how long I have to live and I certainly don’t want to look back on my life and wonder what on earth I was doing for a huge chunk of it.

Going to university is a big deal, but it’s also eight months ago. This means that I should still be focusing on right now and anyone that I spend time with should not be thinking of my time with them as one with an expiry date. I already know who I can and can’t count on and I am very happy with the friends that I have, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t make new ones. If the people I meet see me as the sort of person that will go away and completely forget about them they are surely mistaken. I make effort. If I care about you, I will make some form of contact with you and if you don’t reciprocate then I know where I stand.

Life is all about discovery, I am always discovering new things about myself, others and the way others see me. Sometimes these discoveries can be painful and sometimes they can be marvelous.

I am in a good place in my life and I know that I don’t have time for bullshit.

I will focus only on the positives and the people that make me truly happy.

Laters taters,

XOXO

Hannah.

A weight lifted.

Sorry it’s been a while, but I promise I have a good excuse!

After weeks and weeks of panicking over my personal statement (and various other things) I have finally finished it.

I went through a lot of ups and downs along the way, this is what made me change my mind about Uni the first time around. In sixth form, when we began to use UCAS and start our applications I freaked out, it wasn’t so much the applying but being unable to write a personal statement.

I know now that I was unable to write it because I had not yet discovered what I really wanted to do. It took taking a bunch of different courses to realise that Journalism and Creative writing is what I really want to do, if I had gone to Uni after sixth form I would have taken the completely wrong course and felt completely lost and confused in what I wanted to do as a career after Uni.

I still panicked this time around, but only at the end. I was struggling to finish the personal statement because I felt I hadn’t written enough, when considering that we had a limit it turns out I had written too much and had to condense it.

It just goes to show that sometime University isn’t always for you at a certain time in your life, that doesn’t mean that it isn’t for you period.

I am now in the process of completing my UCAS application and with the personal statement segment finished it should be a lot easier.

Wish me luck guys!

Love, love, love…

XOXO

Hannah.

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